One upon a time, atop a giant hill, there sat an enourmous castle. And in this castle, lived the most hideously ugly princess in all the land. I mean, seriously, this chick was hard to look at. All her sevants had to be nearsighted or legally blind. Otherwise, they’d end up involunatarily coughing up their […]
First of all, I want to make something clear. I don’t believe that someone should use their blog to plug products or services. That said, sometimes you just have to break the rules. Especially when it’s for something you really believe in. About a week ago, my left thumb started to hurt. Every hour or […]
Baby, I know our relationship couldn’t be better right now, but it’s not like I haven’t been trying. A little less communication would help. I mean, when I write to you, you don’t have to write back straight away. I can wait a few hours. Or even days. Hell, you don’t have to write back […]
He pressed the gun barrel against my head and pulled the trigger. There was no hesitation, no long-winded speech. One minute I was alive and pleading for my life. The next minute, I had no life to plead for. Don’t shed a tear for me. There is no reason to mourn. I am not a […]
Dear Student: Thank you for enrolling in my class. Unfortunately, due to lack of interest, I have been forced to cancel it. Apparently, a lot of people thought that the course listing was nothing more than a prank. I suppose I can understand this. But I was really looking forward to sharing with you all […]
He was a man and she was a woman. Good start. They were also heterosexual. Again, that was working in their favor. He looked pretty good for his age and she was incredibly hot. It was just a matter of time before they would find each other. Unfortunately, that matter of time turned out to […]
Hey, thanks. I appreciate the thought, but it seems like you’ve made a horrible mistake. You see, it’s not my birthday. No, really. If anyone would know, it would be me. And what’s with all of these Over The Hill jokes? Aren’t those for people over 40? C’mon, give me some credit. Do I look […]
I had to perform my civic duty last week and I thought I’d share with you what I learned. Keep in mind, this is just based on what I encountered through the L.A. County court system. If you live in a different area, don’t bother reading any further. OK, are all those other losers gone […]
The scene begins in the library of a large English manor. Three men and two ladies sip tea and nibble on scones. NIGEL, a man in his late 40s, dons a tweed sport coat, sweater vest and monocle. PIP is in his early 20s. He wears an all-white tennis outfit. REGINALD is a man in […]
Hey there. Sorry about making you wait so long for another entry, but, well, I don’t have any ideas that are worth posting right now. Honestly, my mind has been elsewhere lately. In the meantime, I thought I’d share with you something that I witnessed recently. Last weekend, while exiting my building, a good friend […]