At a loss for words

Just last week, my stalker and I were at the Beverly Center, attempting to look like we could afford things there. On our way down the escalators, I noticed two teenagers in front of us wearing Ed Hardy clothing from head to toe (they even had on Ed Hardy tennis shoes). “Look,” I whispered to my stalker, “douche bags in training.” We chuckled to ourselves and then I noticed a much younger girl in front of them who was probably the sister or something. She, too, was wearing Ed Hardy clothing—which got us to wondering: What’s the female equivalent of a douche bag? My stalker suggested “douche purse,” but that doesn’t make any sense at all. And so I open the question to my readers. What is the female equivalent of a douche bag? Anyone?

Comments 7

  1. Jamie wrote:

    A search on Google tells me it’s ‘douchebaguette’ which sounds like some kind of bread.

    I get 18,300 results searching ‘female equivalant of douchebag’, so it seems to be a question that’s plagued many. :3

    Posted 14 Aug 2009 at 6:40 am
  2. Pip wrote:

    Well, assuming that the pattern here is “a means of cleansing the opposite gender’s genitalia,” I suppose a female douche bag would be called a “washcloth.”

    But you’ll have to REALLY say it with feeling.

    Posted 21 Aug 2009 at 4:16 am
  3. Smivey wrote:

    Hmmm washcloth sound almost too positive. What about wash rag? Or just rag? Eh. Maybe not.

    Posted 21 Aug 2009 at 8:22 am
  4. Lani wrote:

    To me, the equivalent of a “douchebag” is a “Dumbass.”

    Posted 22 Aug 2009 at 5:39 pm
  5. laughing wrote:

    I don’t know but I once heard a joke that went like this…

    Question “How do you brain wash a woman?”

    Answer “Jump on her douch bag”

    Posted 23 Aug 2009 at 6:33 pm
  6. loveandhatela wrote:

    Its funny when you see teenagers, but its just plain sad when you see middle age men wearing the stuff…talk about mid life crisis.

    Equivalent of Douche bag?

    How about:

    smelly whore
    or my favorite:
    used tampon

    as in “that chick is such a UT….used tampon” :)

    Posted 29 Aug 2009 at 3:26 pm
  7. Julie wrote:

    LOL! DOUCHE PURSE sounds awesome to me!!! Or, douche satchel. Google it if you don’t know what a satchel is :)

    Posted 07 Sep 2009 at 5:26 pm

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