Sorry, I’ve been very busy with work and whatnot lately. Not much creativity left at the end of the day. That said, I watched Marie Antoinette the other night and it got me to thinking:
In the film, when the ladies approach someone, they lower their eyes, grab their dress and curtsey. I’m not talking about some weak-shit curtsey either. When they curtsey, they mean business: all the way down, one leg crossed behind the other—and hold two, three, four—and rise. No doubt the ladies of that time period had some major thigh muscles. Do you think they worked out? If so, what kind of exercises do you think they did? I mean, I don’t think The Queen would be doing squat thrusts, but I guess you never know.
Of course, the guys of that time period had it easy. All they had to do was bow: one hand in front, the other in back, a full bend at the waist, and rise. Not much of a workout, but it’s certainly a sign of respect. Sometimes, they might top it off with a “and a good morning to you, Madam” or a simple “good afternoon.” Classy and respectful.
So why is it that we’ve evolved into these people who insist on shaking hands when we meet someone new? I mean, we just met them. How are we to know where their hands have been? Is it a sign of respect or are we just saying that although we don’t know this person, we are willing to trust that they are not carrying any diseases and have thoroughly washed their hands after using the bathroom? Whatever the case, I don’t like it.
I say we start a new trend. Guys, the next time you meet someone, forego the handshake and give them a respectful bow. Ladies, well, you’re going to have to curtsey, so I suggest you start with those squat thrusts now. And for those of you who think this is stupid and refuse to take part in my little experiment, I metaphorically remove my glove, smack you across the face and challenge you to a duel.