It’s not like I expected it to happen this way. There I was, hanging out at my friend’s place. I was 15 and he was 14. His parents were still at work, so we had the whole place to ourselves.
Anyhow, I guess we got bored, because we started playing with stuff that we found sitting around. One of our favorite objects of distraction: a hook with a suction cup on the end of it. Being the adventurous boys that we were, we stuck that hook to everything we could find: the wall, the TV screen, the table. Then my friend did something really funny: he stuck it to his forehead. Of course, I had to give it a try. I discovered that if I lifted my eyebrows, the suction would be lost and the hook would fall off, but if I didn’t move my brow, the cup would remain in place. I actually got pretty good at keeping it on.
Anyhow, we were watching TV for a while and I turned to my friend to tell him something and he laughed. The suction cup was still on my forehead. Well, you can imagine my embarrassment. I quickly popped it off and tossed it onto the coffee table. But my friend kept laughing. When I turned to tell him to shut up, he laughed even harder. I asked him what was so funny and he told me to go look in the mirror.
Well, if you haven’t figured it out by now, I had a pretty big hickey right in the middle of my forehead. Yes, my first hickey, and it was self-inflicted. And it was on my goddamn forehead! Fortunately, it was the early 80s and my hair was pretty long back then. I just brushed my hair forward and used a little acne cream to cover it up while it healed.
I don’t regret anything I did that day. Sure, it was stupid. But it led to me writing a pretty amusing Seinfeld spec script years later. Wanna see? You can download it by clicking here. It’s in PDF format. Okay, I gotta go to work. Who knows, maybe you’ll get more that two entries this week (don’t count on it).
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