Thought you might like to know why I haven’t written in a while. Well, I haven’t been feeling too creative these past couple weeks. That, and my life is boring.
You know what I did today? I went to the bank, got some groceries and did the laundry. Thrilling, isn’t it? After that, I spent the rest of my afternoon watching DVDs and surfing the Web. Exciting, I know.
Then, as usual, my neighbor Greta paid me a visit. She likes to drop in every week or so for tea. Greta is 98. Oh, and she often forgets to dress herself before she goes out.
Actually, I’m not sure if Greta really forgets to put clothes on every day or if she just doesn’t care anymore. Maybe she gets up in the morning and says Fuck it, I’m 98. I’m going naked. All I know is, it’s very disturbing and I really can’t take much more of it. Besides, I’m having a hard time making up excuses for why she can’t sit on my couch.
But that’s not the worst of my problems. I think some of the neighbors are starting to gossip. I mean, when a naked 98-year-old woman walks out of your door and thanks you for a lovely time, people are gonna talk. But hey, what am i supposed to do, not answer my door?
I think I’m going to have to confront her and get this all out in the open. After all, we’re both mature adults (quite an understatement for her). Maybe we can come up with some kind of compromise. For instance, she could start wearing one of those hospital gowns. Technically, it’s still clothing, but it’s open in the back, so she’d still feel that cool breeze on her rear. Honestly, I’d be happy if she just started wearing underwear.
But enough about my problems. I shouldn’t bore you with my mundane life. Then again, I can’t always be about the funny. Sometimes I just need to get some things off my chest. Kind of like my neighbor Greta, only in a less literal sense.
Maybe one day you can attend a nude beach with Greta…
You make me giggle…
I think she’s trying to tell you something. I mean, it’s obvious she likes you.
a 2 AM post . . . you were probably dreaming about her!
or . . .
Bah. You made her up. Admit it!
This story is just as true as all the other stories on this page.
your life is much more exciting than mine
i rarely have nude people on my couch
bah
Trluy intriguing, perhaps you should intrude on her in the same state of undress, thereby possibly
shocking her into the realization that not everyone goes around naked, or perhaps that will just become the norm in your part of the world and the whole neighbourhood will be a naked neighbourhood, and no one would be uncomfortable, because who gets uncomfortable when they’re naked….well unless you’re sitting down. ;)
Come oooon, throw some plastic on the couch and invite Greta back for tea. I have two nudists in my home and they don’t have anywhere to go back to…Yeah they’re toddlers so…wait they’re actually at the same end of the life circle as Greta…Oh the crap that’s ended up on my couch. Have tea, have a laugh.
I know the real reason why you keep letting the nekkid Greta in your place. You just want to play Connect the Mole Spots or Find That Constellation. Quite the selfish sneak you be.
I am quite offended by such an accusation. I would do no such thing. Those lines on Greta’s body were there before I had any contact with her. However, I will admit that it sounds like a challenging game.
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