The producers of Everything Sucks are proud to announce a whole new season of wacky hi-jinx. What will the title of this all-new side-splitting blog be? Nobody knows for sure. Seriously. We have no idea. But soon you’ll be able to look forward to such gems as this:
I can’t believe it. It finally worked. All those letters I wrote. All those calls I made. They weren’t in vain after all. I thought perhaps Hugh had lost it when he agreed to do some TV commercials for a local hamburger joint. But I was so wrong. The man is a genius. Girls of The Big Ten? Yawn. Gimme something really hot. Something every guy fantasizes about: White trash! Oh baby! Break me off a piece of that! I guess I can stop getting my petition signed now and devote all my energy to my new campaign: Saggy But Sexy: Women Over 80. What really goes on in those nursing homes after dark? Turn to page 38 to see Grandmas Getting It On. Baby, I’ll rub ointment on your bed sores any day of the week.
8 Comments